A change of heart
by Suuz
Summary: Bella's heart is broken when Edward falls in love with Alice. Both Bella and Jasper are hurt more than they are willing to admit and they decide to leave the Cullen Family. BellaxJasper romance. rated m just to be on the safe side.
1. Chapter 1

AN+Disclaimer: This idea came to me when I was under the shower, so take that SM , that's way cooler than in a dream. Don't know if it's going to work out, but it's something I had to write. But anyway I don't own Twilight and all its characters belong to the talented Stephenie Meyer.

**Chapter 1: ****Changes**

For the past forty years I had lived in a wonderful bliss, I married the man I loved and got a beautiful child, Renesmee. But more importantly I knew that our wedding vows were special, after all, who could say that they really got forever? I never came to regret the decision I made when I married Edward; not even for a second. If I was to do it over again, I would give up my mortality in a heart beat. The first decade of our marriage, we really got to know each other. we knew each others desires, hopes, dreams and thoughts, without the need of Edward's special ability. After a decade I finally decided that Edward wasn't going to make fun of my thoughts, though he often found them strange, and let him in my head all the time. That was until a couple of months ago; Edward started to behave differently around me, but he wouldn't tell me what was going on. So I blocked my thoughts from him, as punishment. I thought it would drive him crazy and he would finally tell me what was bothering him; but it didn't. Even Renesmee noted that something was wrong and she confronted me about it. "Mom, why are you and dad acting funny?" she asked me. I smiled at her and touched her check. "I wish I knew, honey. I'm sorry I don't know what's wrong with daddy." I told her honestly, I knew that lying to her wouldn't do any good, and she would blame me for it. She touched my arm and let me see a memory she had of Edward and me having fun in 'our' meadow, kissing, hugging and joking around. I smiled at the memory, but suddenly it changed and I saw how we became more distant to one another, and I started to understand her worry. I put my arms around her, told her to go worry about her own marriage, and that I was perfectly capable of taking care of myself. "But mom, what if it's too late?" I smiled a genuine smile at her. " Darling, if you truly love each other, it's never too late." She left but she got me thinking. What was wrong with me and Edward? My feelings for him didn't change, they only got stronger through time. But what if this wasn't the case for Edward? What if he got sick of me? I decided not to let things take their natural course, but talk to him about it. soon. Just not today.

The following weeks I noticed that Edward did indeed behave oddly, but so did Alice. So when they went on a hunting together I went to see Jasper. Now that my blood wasn't tempting him anymore, it turned out that Jasper was a really good friend. In the last forty years he slowly but surely became my best friend in the whole world. He didn't control my emotions and therefore I granted him a side of him, I never showed anyone, not even Edward. When Jasper had asked me about it I told him that I was saving it for the moment forever seemed to be too long. Anyways when I knocked on his door, he immediately opened. "Hey Bells, I could feel your rollercoaster emotions all the way up here, so what's up?" he stared at me and I couldn't help but tell him the truth, instead of the initial small talk I had in mind. "Well, I was just wondering, don't you think Alice and Edward behave oddly lately?" I shrugged my shoulders as if it wasn't a big deal, but it was, and he knew it. You can't lie about your feelings and concerns with an empathy as best friend. "Well, yeah, but I thought it was just Alice, she's hiding all her emotions around me now, like she's always numb, I don't know how she does it, and I don't know what to make of it." He put his hand in his hair like he always does when he's worried. "I'm sure it's nothing." I said trying more to reassure myself than him. But I was worried; I felt anxious like tonight was going to be the night it was all going to explode, _in my face that is._

That night when Alice and Edward returned I was waiting, I let my guard down and thought "_we need to talk, in private. Meet me at the meadow_." Edward nodded once, showing he got the message loud and clearly. So I took off to our meadow and seconds later Edward appeared there as well. "So what do you want to talk about?" Edward tried sound casual, but I knew him better than that, he was tense. "Are you going to tell me what's wrong with you, or do I have to pull it from you?" I asked sounding a bit more sharp than I intended. He sighed and sat down petting the grass to indicate I should go sit next to him. I decided to keep standing, which caused him to shrug and start his story anyway "Forever is a long time."

And that was all I needed to know, he was having an affair with Alice. It all made sense now, why they were both behaving funny. Alice not bugging me to go shopping with her, and the total lack of a sex life for me and Edward, it even explained why jasper was worried. I felt the need to start crying, and for the first time since I became a vampire, I was grateful I couldn't. So when I asked him to continue I knew what he was going to say but it still came as a shock to me. He stared at me with an apologetic look in his eyes. "The life span for a normal human marriage is about forty years. And we have been married for forty years."

I nodded. "and your point is?"

"Well I think that our forever is over now."

I was in shocked "Why?" was all I managed to get out, not willing to accept the think I already knew.

"well Bella, you are the mother of my child" Edward said "and I will always be grateful for that. but if I had to do it all over again, I wouldn't have married you. It's unnatural to promise someone forever, when you know it will literary be forever. And my feelings have changed, I'm not in love with you anymore, I'm in love with someone else--"

I interrupted him. "You're in love with Alice, so now what, you're going to leave me?" he nodded. "Alice and I are going to Australia, we are going to give you and jasper and the family the time to heal, and when a decade or so are passed I hope you and Jasper will find it in your heart to forgive us, and realize, that love can't be understood. That maybe then we can be a family again." He pause for a minute looking at me when I went to sit on the ground. "I'm sorry Bella, I know I promised to never leave you again." I nodded , feeling numb. He was leaving me again, but I wasn't going to allow him to do the leaving this time; they needed to stay with the family. They needed them more than they needed me, even though they'd never admit that. I knew I would leave, and if Jasper wanted to, I would leave with him.

When I looked up to tell Edward that he was already gone, so I stood up and ran to the house as fast as I could, I stopped Edward and Alice as they were loading boxes into the car. "You don't get to leave this time." I told them. "I'm going to leave."

Alice stared at me in shock, apparently her vision weren't so clear anymore. "I'm sorry Bella. But you're a Cullen now, and we are the ones that are tearing our family apart, you deserve to be with the rest of the family."

I shook my head furiously. "No! Alice you two don't get to leave. I love this family to death, but it will be my death if I stayed. I know they will never admit it, but they will blame me for tearing this family apart. Not in the beginning, but time will fade, and they will forget why you left. You belonged to them, long before I did! I made up my mind, and once I made up my mind I'm not going to change it. So either way I'm leaving, and I don't care whether or not you stay. " I took a deep breath to calm myself down "and seeing that there isn't a use for us all to leave, I suggest that you stay."

"Bella…" Edward began, I lowered my shield _"Don't Edward, you've done enough damage."_

I walked over to them and kissed both of them on the cheek. "I love you two, but I can't be around you or anyone who likes you right now, even though in their eyes you did something wrong as well; they love you, and right now I hate you."

I held my head high and walked to Jasper's room, I sighed deep to put my emotions in check and opened the door without knocking. I was shocked to find Jasper dry sobbing on the bed, I've never seen him sobbing before. I went to sit next to him and pulled him into my arms." It's going to be okay baby. I'm here, let it all out." I said rubbing circles on his back. He responded by pulling me even closer; like letting go of me would mean the end of the world, and right now it probably felt that way to him. We needed each other now more than ever. "Jazz, honey, I'm going to leave." His head shot up, his eyes widened and he shook his head in disbelieve. "You're what?" "I'm going to leave, I'm the one that does the leaving this time, I don't grant him that satisfaction, again." I took a sharp intake of breath uncertain if Jazz wanted to come with me but I needed to ask "I want you to come with me, do you want to?"

"But Carlisle, Esmee, even Emmet and Rose?"

"They will understand, besides they will eventually forget why Edward and Alice left and hate us for tearing up their family."

Jasper nodded in agreement

"So what do you say Mr Whitlock, do you want to come with me?"

He looked scared "but what if I am not strong enough, what if I drink human blood again?"

I stared into his golden eyes, amazed that he was so scared, I paused for a moment, thinking what I could say to him to make him feel better. "I don't know, what I would do without a support system either, Jazz. The only reason I became a vegetarian is because of you guys."

"But you never drunk human blood." He argued

"I did, remember, when I was pregnant with Nessie."

" that doesn't count."

"All right, so my record is clean, but I've had a support system from the start, and you didn't. I want to know if I can keep to this life style when I don't have a support system to fall back on, don't you? Don't you want to know, that you can do it on your own? Please Jazz , I'm leaving anyway, but I want my best friend with me; so what do you say?"

He nodded. "You're right, besides when you put it like that, how could I resist?" he chuckled before adding "So miss, Swan, where are we going?"

AN: I really like to know what you think, whether or not I should continue this story, if there's a problem with my grammar and please tell me, because it's so annoying to read fan fiction, with mistakes in it. anyways I hope you enjoyed reading this chapter as much as I loved writing it.


	2. Chapter 2

**Disclaimer: I still don't own Twilight, because if I did. I would give Jasper a bigger part, instead of he just stands there looking pained and messing with everybody's emotions**

AN: I'm so happy by the huge response of the first chapter (in my humble opinion, it's huge). So therefore I proudly present Chapter 2. I'm sorry if Jasper's a bit OOC but than again, SM didn't let us get to know the 'real' Jasper.

**Chapter 2: Leaving**

I never thought about leaving before. Why should I? I had a man I loved to bits and he loved me back to bits, but times change and I was going to leave. I did not know the destination yet; all I knew was that I had to get out of this house as fast as I could. I was so glad Jasper had decided to come with me; I don't what I would do without him. Unfortunately, we still had to say our goodbyes and explain why we were leaving. It was hard for me, because I had to explain to my daughter why I was leaving, without her father, whilst a few weeks ago I told her it was never too late for anything if you loved someone; but that was the problem, Edward didn't love me anymore.

"Stop worrying, Bella. I'm sure Nessie will understand." Jasper told me as we were still sitting on his bed.

"How did you know, what I was thinking?" I asked him "You are not the one with the mind reading ability." Ouch that stung, Jasper grimaced; I hated I inflicted him with even more pain through my feelings.

"Well and you're not the one with the visions, so stop trying to predict how Nessie will react." he shot back. By the look on his face he was just as hurt by saying something about her as I had been about saying something about E-him. The irony of the situation hit me and I couldn't help but to start laughing, this of course caused a very confused vampire to raise his eyebrows at me, probably thinking I finally lost it.

"It's kind of ironic isn't it? We sitting here together, trying to imagine how everybody else will react, like we are the villains."

"I feel a little bit like a villain" he told me "plotting to leave, to an unknown destination, while leaving the rest of the family behind."

"I know what you mean." I agreed with him. I reached for his hand and gently squeezed in it. "You listen to me. We Are Going To Survive This." I said emphasising every word. "We are going to show them, we can live without those two and be better persons for it. That is of course when we wallowed in our sorrows for so long, that we forgot what we were wallowing about." I tried to joke, but it sounded serious even to my own ears.

"Sounds like a good plan to me."

Later that afternoon when we had packed our stuff, leaving everything behind that reminded us of the two of them (except everything I had that reminded me of Nessie as well), I called Nessie. "Hey Darling, it's mom. Could you come over? it's really important, and bring Jake with you." I hang up before she had a chance to ask any questions. It was going to be so hard saying goodbye to my most prized possession. I wanted her to come with me, but I knew that would be selfish. She had her own life now, her own man to be worried about. I flinched; maybe I should have chosen Jake instead of Edward. We would have gone old, gray and wrinkly together. However as soon as that thought crossed my mind I dismissed it. I had a beautiful daughter, a family, and I had memories of forty years of love and adoration. I sighed, I did not want to say goodbye, I tried talking Jazz in leaving with just a note telling them why we left, but Jazz said we owed them more than that. I knew he was right so we, ass always. We decided to tell everyone that we were leaving at the same time. We would have each other to keep us going when we were at to the though bits, and we would save ourselves the heartache we knew we would face if we told it to everyone separately.

Three quarters later everyone, except for Alice and Edward (the cowards), were sitting in the living room, staring at Jasper and me with puzzled looks on their faces. Nessie was the first one to speak. "Mom what is going on? Where are dad and Auntie Alice?" I took a deep inhale of breath. "I'm going to tell you, but you have to promise me you won't interrupt my speaking. That goes for all of u" I used my stern glare and everyone promised to keep silent. I reached for Jaspers hand, which was already reaching towards me, as he sensed my need for comfort.

"Okay here we go….This morning Jasper and I found out that Alice and Edward were having an affair." Everyone was silent for a moment, before everyone started talking at once, some had a disbelieving look on their face, others a hurt one. Even with my higher senses I couldn't make out what they were saying, except for Emmett's outraged "That's bull, Bella! They would never do that to you, to us." I put my hand on his shoulder, silencing everyone.

"Remember your promise people." I shot a glance at Nessie, and looking at her broke my already broken heart into even more pieces; she had tears in her eyes and was clinging on to Jacob for her dear life. "It isn't too late to make it up with daddy, is it mom?" She asked in a little voice. I bit my lip, I had to be strong, I couldn't break down in front of her. Jasper pulled me to his chest, whispering to me we would be okay and survive this. Somehow I doubted him, even though I used the exact same words not an hour earlier. "I'm so sorry honey, but it is too late." I told her.

"You promised!" Nessie cried out "You said it would never be too late if you loved someone and you love daddy!"

I looked at her, desperation was all I could feel right now: how could I tell my daughters what I had to tell her, I looked at Jasper for help, and saw that he was at loss for words either. I took a few ragged breaths. "Nessie, of course I love your father, I love him to bits. But he doesn't love me anymore. As I was saying before Alice and Edward were having an affair, but they don't want it to be an affair anymore. They say they love each other and that they want their shot at being happy. I am not making Edward happy anymore, and the same goes for Jazz and Alice. The truth is I'm kind of relieved that it isn't something I did or didn't do, you just can't force people to love you, the way you love them."

Carlisle started to say something but I stopped him again. "It hurts so much to know that the one person I promised my heart for forever, doesn't want it. Therefore I decided to leave and I asked Jasper to come with me; he agreed" Jasper squeezed my hand reassuringly, letting me know I was doing a good job. This time Carlisle didn't interrupt us, instead Esme stood up, and she walked over to us and put her arms closely around our necks in a hug. "I love you guys, and if anyone has to leave it's going to be them. You two are my family"

I smiled a sad smile at her. "Thank you, Esme. You know how much I love you and that I see you as a mother, but I can't stay. I can't survive him leaving me for a second time, this time I have to be the one to do the leaving." Esme considered that for a moment, before she realised she had no choice in the matter. She had to let us go. "I'll miss you." She confessed. I couldn't control my feelings any longer, and I started dry sobbing in her chest. "I'll miss you too."

After what felt like hours I looked up and gazed across the room and saw the vampires I considered my family pained and divided, between feeling sad of us leaving and angry at them for making us leave. But I knew they loved Edward and Alice just as much as they loved Jasper and me. I just didn't know what to say to them. I was grateful when Jasper decided it was time he said something.

"This morning was one of the blackest events in my life, and that says a lot." Jasper began "But you're my family, and no matter where we are, or what we do, we stay family." I couldn't imagine how hard it must be for him to tell them that. Especially because he isn't dealing with just his own emotions but the ones of everyone in the room. "Of course I'm angry at Alice and at Edward. I have every right to be." he paused for a moment to collect his thoughts. "But that doesn't mean you can't love them anymore. You have to forgive them, because that's what family does. No matter what you do, Family forgives you."

Rosalie interrupted Jasper. "Jazz, how could we forgive them, when they're taking you away from us?"

Jasper smiled a sad smile at her. "If you can forgive me for killing innocent people, you can forgive them for something as petty as cheating." He stared to the ceiling for a moment, clinging to my hand for dear life. I knew that if I had been human he would have broken every bone in it. "Bella and I will be okay. We will come back to you guys; we just need time. We need time to heal and staying here would prevent us just that."

We said our goodbyes and we hugged and kissed and told them we would be alright, Carlisle promised he would be just a phone call away, Esme told us how proud she was at us, Emmett cracked a bad joke and Rosalie told me that 'I wasn't so bad after all, and that I should return home safely.' That left us with Jake and Nessie. I stared at my daughter and pulled her into my arms. "I love you so much, you know that right?" she nodded her head and tightened her grip around my waist. "Don't be too mad at daddy, alright. He gave me the most precious gift in the world."

She looked at me confused "What did he ever give you besides a broken heart?"

"Silly girl, he gave me you. There's nothing in the world I care more about than you."

"So why do you have to go?" she sobbed into my shoulder.

"Because, I have to sugar, but it will not be for forever." I kissed her forehead for the last time "I'm just a phone call away." I promised her. I let go of her and looked at my friend, who stood by me trough all this years. "Jake…." I didn't know what to say or do so we stared at each other for several minutes before I pulled him into another bear hug. "Take care of her, for me." He nodded his head and whispered "You know I will. Come back soon, okay. Who else can I beat playing poker?" I went to wipe away the tears on my cheeks, but I realised I couldn't cry; so I settled for wiping the tears from Nessie's cheek.

"I wish you could come with me." I confessed to her.

"I wish so too, but I have a life here, a home with Jake." She said with tears in her Eyes and I understood perfectly well. She continued emotion thick in her voice. "Call me when you get settled somewhere, okay mum? I need to know that you're safe."

"I promise, Nessie."

I turned around to Jasper. "Are you ready?"

"As ready as I ever will be." He answered.

I shot one last glance at my daughter and climbed inside the passenger's seat of the brand new red truck I got for Christmas last year. Jasper took his position behind the steering wheel and asked "Where do we go from here, Bells?"

"I don't know, Jazz. Just drive."

He was silent for a minute "How does Texas sound?" he finally asked me.

I slowly nodded my head; it was a good idea "Take me to your home, Jasper. Take me to see some real cowboys."

"Yes Ma'am" he said in his beautiful southern accent and he started the engine.

I looked backward till I couldn't see the house anymore. I was sad to leave behind the people I spent the last forty-three years of my life with. For the first time in my life I didn't know what the future would bring, and it scared me to no end. At least I wouldn't go on this journey alone; I had my own solitary cowboy with me. I looked up at him and said the only two words I could think of.

"Thank you."

AN: So I hoped you liked this chapter, I know it was a bit sad, hell I cried writing it. But I'm a cry baby.


	3. Chapter 3

Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight, I just wish.

AN: Thank you for the kind reviews and the add to all of your favourites. I hope this chapter lives up to your expectations.

I also want to thank my friend Anita for offering to beta my story and try to limit my use of comma's.

**Chapter 3: Texas**

We drove to Texas in complete silence. I didn't know what to say. What do you say when you're broken, maybe even beyond repair? Moreover, what do you say to someone who's equally broken, if not more? I felt guilty, like maybe if I had tried harder Edward wouldn't have noticed Alice. We'd still be in Canada, and be together as one big happy family. Jasper didn't say anything either, he probably didn't know what to say either -- or he sensed my need to dwell in my misery in complete silence.

I didn't know when I'd feel the need to talk again. I wished I was still a human, so I could meet up with my two best friends in the whole world; Ben and Jerry. Our pattern of silence was broken as Jasper felt my melancholy.

"What's there to be melancholic about?" he asked me curiously.

"I was just thinking, I wanted to be human again." I stared out of the car window

"Why?"

"I miss Ben and Jerry." It felt stupid to talk about something so unimportant as ice cream. Especially after what we just went through. Jazz stared out of the window for a second.

"Cookie dough, right?"

I felt a wave of surprise hit me. I hadn't expected him to remember what kind of ice-cream I ate when I was feeling miserable. I nodded "If I were still human, I would eat tons of it and than I would get really fat."

"What kind of revenge is that?" he rolled his eyes at me, "at least I would think up some stupid strategy to get even, and hurt her as much as she'd hurt me."

"Too bad Alice sees everything, otherwise you could still do that."

He bit his lip. "I don't want to, Bella! I've spent my whole human life, and a big part of my vampire life as well, playing games. Games of life and death and I don't want to do that for the rest of forever. I don't want to become so bitter I can't see that there are good things in life as well. I want to dwell in my pain for a bit, then pick up the pieces, and move on."

I considered this for a moment, musing on the words moving on. Could I ever move on from Edward? Was it possible that someone could make me feel the same way as Edward did? Probably not, but then again first loves are always special, however, they were not supposed to last. Mine lasted for over forty years, it was time for me to get a life and move on. I never let go when Edward left me the first time, hell I even became an empty shell. I couldn't do that again, I had to let him go.

"You're right Jazz, as usual. We need to let them go."

"But not just yet. We need to mourn first."

I looked into his eyes and noticed that they were pitch black. "That's not the only thing we need to do, we need to hunt."

He nodded in agreement "First hunt than mourn." He agreed and I repeated those words over and over again in my head.

For the past three weeks Jazz and I stayed at a small village in Texas in a cute little inn. We told the old couple who run the inn we were newly weds -- how ironic – so we had an excuse to stay inside. Except for breakfast and dinner of course, people have to eat. I hated those times of the day, eating something that tasted like dirt wasn't even the worst part, the throwing up was. We didn't speak, it seemed like we came to some sort of silent agreement not to talk and just sit there. Silence is a funny thing, sometimes you appreciate it and sometimes you hate it. For the past three weeks I had been silent, and so had Jazz, and enjoyed each others company. I studied every crack in the wall, and every brushstroke on the painting. I missed Nessie and mourned for my loss. But after three weeks of doing nothing but thinking and staring I wanted to do something else, besides mourning for someone who wasn't even dead in the first place that is.

"So it's time then." Jazz stated.

I looked up and stared at him, puzzled. " Time for what?"

"Time to pick up the pieces and move on."

I nodded my head. "Do you know why I love your power, Jazz?"

He shook his head. "I don't particularly like it, so why would you?"

"Well, you see Jazz, it's because you feel everything I feel, and yet let me feel it anyway, even though it kills you. However, at the moment you sensed it was time for me to move on you reacted to it. You let me be my own person, and I'm grateful for that." I explained to him.

"Well I don't want to mess with your emotion, remember our pact." Jazz said to bring our conversation to a lighter mood.

"How could I forget?" I laughed "I don't ask about your scars, you don't mess with my emotions." I bit my lip, I was ready to move on, but that didn't mean Jazz was that also. "What about you, are you ready to move on?"

He thought about it, like it didn't occur to him before that his feelings mattered just as much as mine do. "Yes, I'm ready." He finally decided.

"So why did you want to go to Texas? To a place where the sun shines a lot?" I brushed the annoying string of hair out my face, great, I thought vampirism came with perfect hair.

"I haven't been here since Alice came to me in that diner, and I felt guilty. There are hundreds of people, who died during the war, buried here; it's time for me to pay them my respects, and tell them I haven't forgotten about them."

If I could, tears would form in my eyes, but instead I was just feeling so much, sorry for Jazz, proud of him at the same time, and love, how could you not love a person so caring as Jasper. I walked over to him and pulled him into my arms. "So how are _we_ going to do that?"

He looked up at me, amazement in his eyes. "You'd do that for me, help me?"

I gently stroke his cheek, "of course I am, silly. After that talk you just gave, there isn't anything I wouldn't do."

He crooked a smile "Well be careful, I might take advantage of that."

There we were a few hours later, at the graveyard, we had brought hundreds and hundreds of white roses, and at every grave, we stopped and put a rose there. Jasper would talk to them and say how sorry he was. I just put my hand on his shoulder and squeeze it gently. Jasper never showed me this side of him, and I just couldn't understand; why would someone ever leave such a kind soul?

When we got back to the inn, we started to make plans on what to do next. It wasn't like we could stay and build ourselves a life in Texas.

"We can't enrol in high school, in Texas." I said.  
"But you want to enrol in High School, again?" he asked me, I nodded my head.

"So what do you suggest we do, miss Swan?"

I thought for a moment I missed Forks, I missed Charlie, I even missed the diner, where we used to eat greasy burgers once a week. "Why don't we go to Forks? We haven't been there for forty years."

"We can't." Jazz said, regret sounding in his voice

"Why not?" I argued

He sighed, "people we knew, might still be alive. They could expose us."

"That's bull, we could easily pose as our grandchildren."

Jazz considered this for a moment. "What do you suggest?"

I started doing the math.

"I could be Bella Black. My mother is Renesmee Carlie Cullen-Black, my father Jacob Black. He was nineteen years older than her, but they loved each other deeply. However they crashed in a tragic car accident in Canada." Jasper nodded his head in approval, knowing that would do. "So that leaves your story." Jasper nodded and asked me if I had any ideas.

"As a matter of fact I do." This would be perfect, and I knew Jasper would be impressed by my tactic skills. "You are Jasper Whitlock, grandson of Jasper Hale and Alice Cullen. Son of Mary Cullen-Whitlock and Ben Whitlock. Your mother died while giving birth, and your father is a general in the U.S. army, currently stationed in Afghanistan.""

"I like it, at least I could pretend I still have a parent. It would give us an excuse to live in a house without parental supervision.

I agreed "And seeing as we are somehow related, it's completely normal your father took me in, when my parents died."

"So we go back to Forks." Jasper mused.

"Yeah, back to the beginning."


	4. Chapter 4

AN: Thank you for all your lovely responses, I enjoyed them, ravished myself in them and let me get inspired by them. So this Chapter is going to be in Jazz's POV, just because it feels to me I wrote him like some sort of empty shell, just knowing and seeing what Bella is seeing, but everybody has feelings, thoughts, and disgusting habits; even my Jazzie

**Chapter 4 Moving back to Forks**

Jasper pov

Life sucks. I'm being unhappy, just plain old fashioned unhappy, nothing life threatening I just feel lost, misunderstood, and even though I am here with Bella I feel completely alone. I wish I could get some sick kick out of my own misery, 'cause then it would have a function, but I just dwell in it, let it consume me. Even though I don't want it to consume me. I don't want to become one of those bitter people…err vampire. I just placed myself inside this bubble, where I'm safe and where it is okay to be completely fucked up. It just seems impossible to leave this bubble…I'm not ready yet, and maybe I never will be…and just sit here and be miserable. This continued for a while, me just feeling empty and not even sad, empty and miserable; not the thing I promised Bella I would do. Oh well, it's not like she's doing any better than me, the misery that radiates from her body is enough to give New York energy for a whole fucking month. It's her fault, she took me away from my home, my family. I felt a wave of guilt hit me as I realised what I just thought, I knew it wasn't true and I knew she couldn't help it. It's just that the silence is driving me crazy, in the traditional sense of the word, not the nice crazy one.

Eventually I felt Bella's emotions change and I knew it was time for us to pick up the pieces and move on. It didn't occur to me to ask myself if I was ready or not, so when Bella asked me that I had to think about it. Was I ready? Why didn't I ask myself if I was ready? I knew why I didn't, Alice never cared. She had premonitions, she knew everything. It didn't matter how I felt, or what I did, because I never got to chance to feel or do anything. I know it sounds kind of strange coming from an empath, but she just made up all the rules, and I got to play by them. Hell, I couldn't even remember the last time I picked out my own clothes. As soon as that pixie walked into my life, I forgot who I was. Why? I shrugged my shoulders, no point in dwelling about it. She just did, it's time I start figuring out who I am, again, starting with figuring out who I used to be.

"So why did you want to go to Texas? To a place where the sun shines a lot?" Bella asked me while brushing a string of red-brown hair out of her face. I smiled at this. It was so Bella, just to have no perfect hair, even when she's a vampire. I pondered for a moment, why I wanted to come here. Soon the reason became obvious; my subconscious was telling me to go back to my roots.

"I haven't been here since Alice came to me in that diner" I paused for a moment, pondering on how to continue "and I felt guilty, I guess. There are hundreds of people, who died during the war, buried here; it's time for me to pay them my respects, and tell them I haven't forgotten about them." My throat burned, but for the first time in a while not from hunger, but from the overpowering emotion of guilt. I was paralyzed for a moment; like I could ever make amends to them. I felt a mix of emotions radiating from Bella, it changed so fast I couldn't really register what she was feeling, however the admiration and wonder was definitely having the upper hand. She stood up and walked over to me, and pulled me in her warm embrace for whispering into my ears. ""So how are _we_ going to do that?"

My head shot up in surprise, Alice never cared, so why should Bella? I was filled with wonder off this beautiful soul. Wishing Edward never left her, she was special, and he ruined her innocence and faith. Not her ability to care, thank god. I would hate for her to become bitter, a bitter vampire isn't something you would want to encounter. "You'd do that for me?" I stared in to her eyes "Help me?" I clarified. Her fingers gently touched my cheek. "of course I am, silly. After that talk you just gave, there isn't anything I wouldn't do." She admitted, slightly embarrassed. I smiled and decided to just put one line out there and then leave the door open. It was just too easy.

After we went to the graveyard, I was drained, but satisfied. It felt good to talk to the people there. A bit odd as I tried to remember my human memories of the war. It had been so long ago, and Alice always told me to leave the past in the past and focus on our future. I'm such a tool, letting a woman set the rules. She scarred me, and I was sad that I didn't know who I am without her by my side. I was glad to reach the solace of our room again. I let myself fall on the bed and enjoyed the soft fabric touching my skin. Bella was still standing there saying nothing, just staring at me with her big golden orbs, thinking.

"We can't enrol in high school, in Texas." She mused.

I sighed, High School? Again? "But you want to enrol in High School, again?" I asked to clarify. Hoping for denial she just nodded her head. Well that stinks. "So what do you suggest we do, miss Swan?"

Her emotions were making me nauseous: loneliness, anger, sadness, melancholy, happiness, all at once. A rollercoaster ride is nothing compared to what she was doing to me.

Why don't we go to Forks? We haven't been there for forty years." She suggested and I groaned. Memory lane. Forks High. I had been happy in Forks.

"We can't." it tore my heart even more apart seeing the disappointment on Bella's face, which soon turned into a stubborn pout. "Why not?"

I sighed, the people we knew there wouldn't be exactly dead, they could expose us. "people we knew, might still be alive. They could expose us." I explained to her, like she was a three year old.

She rolled her eyes at me "That's bull, we could easily pose as our grandchildren."

That was true, we probably could. But did I want to go back to Forks? I wasn't sure, but the hope Bella was radiating was enough for me to give it a shot.

"So What do you suggest?" I asked her.

It was silent for a moment and I didn't need to have my brothers powers to know she was thinking, and thinking hard.

"I could be Bella Black. My mother is Renesmee Carlie Cullen-Black, my father Jacob Black. He was nineteen years older than her, but they loved each other deeply. However they died in a tragic car accident in Canada."

I let this sink in, this was a plan and it would work. All we needed was a story for me. I couldn't really pose as her brother, now could I? Eventually I nodded my head motioning for her to go on. "So that leaves your story…"

So here we were now, on our way to forks, she posing as her daughters daughter. Me posing as Jasper Whitlock, grandson of Jasper Hale and Alice Cullen. Son of Mary Cullen-Whitlock and Ben Whitlock. My life had been tragic as well, my mom died while giving birth, and my dad was a general in the U.S. army currently stationed in Afghanistan. I didn't miss him, he was never there when I grew up. Bella had laughed her butt of as I made my story more dramatic. "Hey at least, when we suddenly disappear, they could make a musical about us now." I laughed as I turned on the radio in the car. "Why didn't we fly again?" I asked her.

Her rhythmic laugh made me smile. "Because we wanted to have a car, right away." She said in a tone as if she were lecturing me.

So back to Forks, I mused. Not quite sure I was ready to face that particular path. "Yeah, isn't it exciting? I'm so curious what happened to Angela." Bella started rambling and I went back to my own personal bubble where I was safe but also alone. I just needed some time to process this. With Bella's excited rambling as a vague background sound in my mind.

Ok so I know, slightly more depressing and I still don't know if it works, even though my beta said it does.


	5. Chapter 5

An:

Hey Folks, sorry for the long wait for the update, life's been crazy..

Still JPOV

We drove towards Forks, and the closer we got the more depressed I got. I really didn't want to stay in the house, really! The memories, I couldn't even begin to think about it, nor could I comprehend the reason for Bella's sudden interest in returning to the place her life got ruined, by us.

"What are you thinking about?" She asked me.

"I don't want to stay in that house." I confessed and she started laughing. "It's not funny." I told her.

She tried to look serious, but she couldn't help the small giggle that escaped her lips. She breathed in and out slowly. "Jazz, I'm not completely insensitive you know." I gave her a mischievous look and she just glared before continuing "I told you already, but you weren't listening. I hired a house, not the Cullen house; I'm not that cruel."

A sigh of relief washed through me. "So why do you want to move back, anyways?" I asked her, not expecting she would answer the question. However, her whole face lit up.

"Forks is a magical place to me. I know, how ironic considering I hated it the first time around. It was the first time I got actual friends, the first place I didn't feel completely closed off, it was the place where I got my first kiss, the place where I first fell in love…" she paused for a moment and glanced in my direction "it's the place I saw my first vampire." I chuckled lightly but she continued "it was the first place that felt like home. I just hope it will work it's magic again."

I let this sink in, Forks was a place of firsts for me also. It was the first place I didn't kill a human. Maybe it would be good for us, and would we find the magic it entails.

The house was absolutely breathtaking, it was relatively new, since it wasn't there when we left. It had a nice front porch, with a few steps leading up to it. At the back was a Veranda and in the garden was a swing set. I could definitely see why Bells picked this house for us. Most important though, that even though we still had neighbours, it was really close to the forest for our occasional hunting trip. Bella tugged my arm and we went inside. It was painted in very natural colour and it immediately felt like home. "Wow, Bella, how did you find this place?" I asked her in astonishment, this normally had been my task. She smiled "I called the real-estate office and the nice woman on the phone said this was the most beautiful house they had on offer, so I said I'd take it."

For the next few days we settled in, I absolutely loved my room, it may seem a bit girlish but it had a fucking balcony. I love balcony's, and now I could sit there at night and just breathe in the fresh air. We also met the neighbours, a nice young couple with a two year old, they were surprised to learn we would live there without supervision, but I told them my dad would call every other day to check in, so it wasn't like we were completely at loss. I was dreading to go back to Forks High though, to be pretending something I'm not. However the excitement that was radiating from Bella made the dreading a little bit less.

Bella's POV

I stared at the phone in my hand. I wanted to call Carlisle to let him know we were settled in Forks and that we were doing well, but somehow it seemed like a huge task. I was trying to find the courage to call and finally I dialled the number and waited.

"This is Carlisle speaking" The voice on the phone said.

"Hey Carlisle, this is Bella."

"Bella! How are you? I'm so sorry, about Jasper. Alice had a vision, do you want to come and get you? I'm so disappointed in him."

"Why would I want that, what did Alice see?" I asked him.

" Ow, it hasn't happened yet. I'm sorry to break this to you, Bells, but Jasper is going to slip. I'm so disappointed in him I thought he was finally getting it." Carlisle sounded so sad

I processed this for a moment. "Are you telling me you're disappointed at your son, for something he didn't do?"

"He didn't do it yet."

I got so angry, how can you be disappointed in someone for something he was going or not going to do, but hadn't done it yet. Besides, Carlisle is his dad, aren't parents to love you unconditionally, support you when necessary?

"And you think, that even if he did slip up, I would leave him?" I sighed in frustration. "Carlisle, I love him, he's my brother. If and only if he was to slip up, he doesn't need our judgement, he needs our support and love. Hell you're his dad you should be there for him."

There was a pause at the other side of the line. "I can hear that you're upset, Bells. Jasper just isn't stable. I love him even if I'm disappointed in him."

"Well, I'm ashamed to call you my dad right now. Tell Esme, Emm and Rose that I love them, but tell Alice to bud out of our lives and go to hell Carlisle." I hang up and was ready for some fighting action. I went upstairs in the hope to find Jazz in for a sparring session but when I opened the door all agitation melted as snow in the sun and I started laughing.

Back at Jasper's pov

The day finally came and we had to go to High School. I stared at my reflection in the mirror. I wanted to make a good first impression, but staring at my reflection, I think I overdone it. I was so deep in my thoughts I hadn't heard or felt Bella coming into my room, but my head shot up the moment she closed my door. I stared at her with despair and she just started laughing. "What are you wearing?"

I shrugged "I wanted to look nice, make a good first impression you know?" I sighed in frustration. "I know it's silly, and girlish, but my mom taught me to be a gentlemen, and I wanted to show that to Forks."

Bella smiled and walked over to me, she also stared into the mirror when she told me "That doesn't mean you have to wear a freaking suit!" She rolled her eyes at me. "I don't want to meddle, but why don't you just wear jeans and a nice sweater."

I smiled at her showing my gratitude. "Thanks, Bells. I don't know what I would do without you."

She giggled "Probably going to High School in a freaking suit!" I grabbed the pillow from my bed and threw it at her, she ducked and left the room, laughing all the way downstairs.

To Say Forks High was Hell would be an understatement. The woman in the office started flirting, not with me, with Bella. Bella was obvious, of course. I thought it was entertaining till the woman slipped her number to my Bells and told her to give her a call if she ever needed _anything._ I had to hold back the growl forming in the back of my throat, I didn't know why tough. Bella shrugged and thanked the woman for her kindness but told her if she needed anything she had me. Sweet innocent Bella. The day just got downhill from there. Between the obvious flirtations from the girls side ( do they have no shame ?) the emotions running through High School were driving me crazy. All the lust, frustration, anger, love, curiosity, run through my body and it frustrated me to no end. It was only less in the classes I shared with Bella, she would reach out for my hand and give me a supporting smile. That girl was amazing, she didn't need to be an empath to know what I feel and she helped me get through the day.

As the days continued it got easier for me. I was getting used to hormones or feeling the need to throw girls on the tables and have my evil way with them. This was mostly because of Bella, she made live bearable. She laughed if she saw me clench my jaw, and the moment she touched me all the emotions of the people surrounding us faded. I used to love living in my own personal bubble, but I had to admit sharing it with Bella was a lot better. That was of course till her excitement hit me after her chemistry class. She ran towards me, a little bit too fast for a human, and smiled her big smile. "Guess what, we're invited to a party, an actual party!" she clapped her hands before grabbing mine and walking to the cafeteria for lunch. This wasn't going to be fun.


	6. Chapter 6

AN: I know I know I keep repeating myself, sorry for the long wait. End of the year finals are coming up and so is the stress. Nevertheless I hope you enjoy chapter 6 of a Change of Heart.

Let me know what you think. It's not proofread by my beta (because she's taking too long.) so forgive me for the errors that are undoubtedly present.

Chapter 6: The party

It happened. It was horrible and even though it was expected it wasn't; the night of the party arrived. What was even more horrendous was the fact we were actually going. We, as in Bella and I, Jasper and Bella, Jasper Whitlock and Bella Cullen. The two of us. Bella has been talking about it non stop. The excitement is radiating off her, and what about me, you might wonder? Well me, not so much, and that's understatement of the year.

I always hated parties, even back in the day it was the only way to socialize. My mum forced me to learn to dance, attend those events, and even worse she also forced me to dance with those mind numbing girls. So when I turned into a vampire I didn't have to go anymore, and I liked that big time. Most vampires don't like to socialize, it was my luck however to fall in love with a socioholic called Alice. Alice loved parties, the attention, the hosting and even the attending of those horrid and dreaded events. At first I joined her in the partying, but I didn't enjoy them. Hell I even got more depressed when Alice dragged me to them. So after a decade or so, Alice and I came to an agreement. I wasn't obliged to go with as long as I let her have the fun of going and hosting the party's. I was required to go to one of those party's a year (the Halloween party). This agreement lasted for almost a century. Not anymore.

Bella and I didn't have an agreement on parties. However, Bella didn't want to host them, or revel in the attention she would undoubtedly get, nor did she really want to attend parties in general, but she wanted to attend this one. The reason; she was actually invited and she didn't want to let her classmates down. So we were going, because I in return didn't want to let Bella down, and wanted to give her a wing man so to speak. So I got dressed to party, plastered a fake smile on my face and I was waiting for my Bella to come down.

Her silk like voice bore through my clouded mind when she said "Penny for your thoughts." My head shot up in surprise and I started laughing. "Bella, you startled me. I should probably visit a doctor."

She giggled at my random remark and linked her arm in mine. "Are you ready?" She asked me.

I nodded and my smile grew even faker "Let's get this party started."

The heat was overwhelming; it didn't feel nice to my cold skin. The raging hormones, the accelerated heartbeats, the pumping of blood, and even the beat of the music were making me hungry. Even though I just hunted the other day I became immediately peckish. Bella looked at me and laid her hand against my cheek. "Ow, Jazzie, I'm so sorry!" she stared in my darkening eyes "Do you want to go home? I didn't think… I completely understand in you want to leave." She rambled.

I hated pity and as I stared into her eyes I was analyzing her emotions. I didn't feel disappointment, pity, or any other negative emotion at all; all I could sense was the overpowering emotions of devotion and concern. So instead of telling her that going home was a great idea, as I really wanted to say, I said

"Dance with me Ms. Cullen." I bowed a little and offered her my hand, like the southern gentleman I am becomes.

Bella looked intently into my eyes and giggled as she put her small pale hand in mine. "How could I resist Mr Whitlock?"

As she laid her pale hand in mine I felt little shock of electricity go through my veins; I choose to ignore them and pulled her close. Soon I was lost in the rhythm of the music and the feeling of Bella touching me. Forgetting the rest of the world as our bodies became one. The songs melted together in one flowing melody and it felt like it was just Bella and me, except it wasn't.

"She's his cousin. I don't dance like that with mine, do you?"

"OMG, what a slut! I heard her daughter married her mother's ex boyfriend. Apparently nymphomania runs in the family."

"That Cullen girl is hot, watch how she's shaking those hips, I would love to get some action with her, if you catch my drift."

I didn't connect the voices to the faces, but I saw red and wanted to shred every one of them to pieces, because they were telling such horrible lies about my Bella. My heart went out to Bella, I couldn't stand the fact she also heard those horrible comments so I pulled her even closer to my chest, like that would block out the voices gossiping about us, but mostly about her.

"It doesn't matter what they say Bells, we know better." I comforted her and when she looked into my eyes I saw an unusual glint.

"Jazz, do you trust me?" She asked in her sweetest voice.

My throat tightened, this wasn't going to be good. So instead on answering I nodded. She grinned in satisfaction. "Trust me on this one."

Before I could even blink her lips were forced forcefully upon mine, she was kissing me like there was no tomorrow, and if that was the case I would die a happy man. Kissing Bella was like heaven and I soon started kissing her back. Our lips melted together as if we were one, like it always should have been that way. I blocked the gossiping voices out and all I could focus on was the beautiful girl in my arms that kissed me like there was no tomorrow.

But in the back of my mind I had this nagging voice, there was a tomorrow, and tomorrow we were going to pay.


	7. Chapter 7

AN:

Dear all,

I'm so sorry for the eternally long wait! I know it wasn't fair to keep you all hanging like that but I was planning on writing this chapter and putting it online almost immediately after the last chapter. However, as always life got in the way. Even though School's out I've been so busy I often have difficulty trying to find time to breathe. So it took awhile and I just kept writing and rewriting this chapter. I know have like ten different version of this chapter and I don't think any of them lives up to you expectation. Even though I feel I'm letting you down with this chapter I hope you do enjoy it. It's not been proofread by my lovely beta, so I'm sorry for all the mistakes that will surely be in there.

**A way out**

**BPOV**

I hate gossip, always have and always will. So when those scumbags were gossiping about me, I didn't care so much, but when they talked about Nessie I lost control. Jazz tried to comfort me, but I didn't want comfort I wanted to give those pieces of meat a piece of my mind. "Jazz do you trust me?" I asked him in my sweetest voice. He nodded and I grinned in satisfaction, they wanted incest? Well I'd show them incest.

"Trust me on this one." and I lunged forward, pressing my lips forcefully on his, kissing him like there was no tomorrow, and everything faded away

Kissing Jasper felt like home. It was just the two of us against the rest of the world. We were the ones that mattered, and nobody else did! At least not at that particular moment. We both knew it was going to bite us in a place where the sun doesn't shine, but it didn't matter; at least, not then. Of course as soon as the voices of our surrounding droned into our perfectly fine bubble the kiss ended and reality kicked in. Reality sucks

Touching my lips in shock I stared at Jasper, who was staring back at me with a look of shock, surprise, lust and something I couldn't place in his eyes. He took my hand and we left the party as soon as we could to keep our 'cover', or what's left of it, intact.

My phone started buzzing as soon as we reached the car. My mind was still buzzing so I acted on reflex and answered my phone. Something I shouldn't have done, because my (ex) pixie friend just saw the whole show and couldn't control herself and called.

"Hello" I said as I answered

"Bella!" yelled the reprimanding voice at the other side of the line "What the hell were you thinking?"

"I wasn't thinking."

"Exactly! You kissed Jasper, Bella! You kissed him and you didn't even think about him, he isn't some sort of toy you know. I want you to stay away from my mate."

The irony of the situation hit me and I started laughing. "Really Alice, you're telling me to stay away from _your _mate? Which one is that, the father of my child or the one you dumped for him?"

Alice sighed and the line was silent for a moment. "I'm sorry Bella. I shouldn't have reacted that way. But I saw you kissing Jazz, and he's so broken. I couldn't stand for you to use him and toss him away."

"I am not using Jasper, Alice." I played with a loose curl "He's my saviour, my hero. If I didn't have him, I wouldn't know what I would do." I said ignoring the fact that he was right next to me and could here me perfectly.

"And now you two are in a huge mess."

"A big stinking mess." I agreed

"Well…just so you know, when Carlisle and Esme adopted me and Edward, we found out that we were born on the same day, and we pretended to be twins, how fun is that?"

And with that the line was broken.

I stared at the display of my mobile, why would she tell me such a thing? I knew the truth and it was obviously a lie, but why would she tell me she and Edward weren't really blood relatives…. I pondered and continued to ignore Jasper who was staring at me.

Then suddenly it hit me! My face lit up and I turned to Jasper

"I hate to admit it Jazz, but Alice is a genius!"

He stared at me confused "huh, what?"

"Alice is brilliant; she gave us a way out."

"A way out of what?" he stared at me blankly

"Well being the town's incestuous couple."

Jaspers eyes budged out of eye sockets "She found us a way out, without involving us moving?" he asked unbelief clear in his voice.

"She did indeed" and I started telling Jasper what Alice told me in detail, concluding that if Edward and Alice weren't really siblings, Jasper and I weren't really blood relatives, so even though we would still be the subject of the towns gossip we at least weren't incestuous.

"I hate it to admit Bella, but you're right. Alice rocks." He smiled a real smile for the first time in a long time. "But how are we going to spread this story, we can't spread it ourselves, can we?"

For the next two hours we plotted our way out of my mess and I finally scraped up all my courage. "I'm sorry" I said

Jasper looked up "Whatever for?"

"For kissing you" we both went silent for a minute

"Do you regret kissing me?" he finally asked

I stared into the fire and thought about it. Did I regret kissing Jasper? No. Do I think it was the right thing to do? No. I carefully considered my words before they left my mouth.

"I do not regret kissing you; however I don't think it was a good idea either. I'm broken merchandise, and you aren't brand new either. I was just so angry, we were finally having some fun you know and then they say we dance like its incest. The only thing I could think about was that I'd show them incest. I regret kissing you for that reason Jazz, because the kiss was amazing." If I could've blushed I would've.

Jasper looked me in the eyes "So you do not regret kissing me, but the reason why you kissed me?" I nodded. "Well it's a good thing I liked being abused by you then" Jasper said indicating the serious side of our conversation was indeed over.

The next day was a Saturday, thank god, so we had time to start our plan. I started writing a letter my 'grandma' gave to me to give to Jessica Stanley

_Dear Jessica, _

_You must wonder why I would write to you after all this time. The truth is you were one of my first real friends I've ever had, and I can't begin to express the regret I feel for throwing everyone, especially you, out of my life. At the time it seemed like the right thing to do, leave with Edward and his family to Alaska to start my education there. I wanted to __build a new life and thought it best to burn the ships I left behind._

_However, at a certain age you've come to realise the mistakes you made. I learned the hard way when Edward left me for Alice. I know what you must think aren't they brother and sister? No they aren't, unfortunately for me. I should've listened to you that day you said Edward and the rest of the Cullens were no good. But let me first explain the complicated family tree of the Cullens. Both Edward and Alice lost their parents and were adopted by Carlisle and Esme Cullen. Edward and Alice happened to be born on the same day and thought it would be cool to act like twins, and so their inside joke became popular believe in Forks back in the day._

_I often wished Edward would've left me sooner, so Jasper and I wouldn't have gone trough all this pain, however, if he had done that I wouldn't have had my beautiful daughter Renesmee, and my precious grand daughter Bella. _

_I hope you can forgive me for throwing you out of my life, I'm sorry. _

_Furthermore I hope you're very happy. May life bring you its best._

_Your friend,_

_Bella Swan_

I let down my pen and felt like a hypocrite for writing such a letter. One could only hope that Jessica would forgive me and start the gossip mills as I delivered the letter.


	8. Chapter 8

AN: I can't begin to express how sorry I am. I'm sorry I left you all hanging for so long, and I have to admit I'm a bit ashamed to update this story. I figured I'd just let this story go into oblivion and people would never notice I stopped updating, however people still read and review this story, telling me how amazing it is. So I wanted to get back into it. If I could have such amazing readers, those amazing readers deserve this story. So I'm finally on Christmas break for uni and I can find the time to write.

Chapter 8: Revelations.

Jessica stared at the unopened envelope in her hands; she traced the handwriting with her thumb. She couldn't believe it, after all these year she still knew whose it was, Bella, Bella Swan – no Bella Cullen. She remembered those High School days, o how she hated to love Bella. Bella was everything she wanted to be, and Bella got everything she had wanted. She had been so jealous and her jealousy had taken over her mind. She had been a bad friend, even though Bella didn't deserve that. Jessica just couldn't stand the way Mike had looked at Bella, following her around like a lost little puppy. It was years later that Jessica had realised she had been an enormous bitch to Bella, for something she couldn't even have helped. Jessica had thought of Bella leaving as a blessing, Mike had finally shown an interest in her. The person who she was, not the jealous bitch. They went to the same college, and after that they got married. They were on top of the world and they thought the world owed them, how wrong they had been. Jessica's hand began to tremble when the memories of that night threatened to overcome her. She took a deep breath, in and out, in and out. She had been 8.5 months pregnant and they had just finished the nursery. Mike had painted little ducks all over the wallpaper when he got paged. There was a row going on at the borders of the town and he was to go over there and break it up. An easy job, not dangerous. They just forgot to tell Mike, that the guys were armed. Mike walked right over to them telling them to cut it out, because people felt unsafe by their behaviour – how she still wished he didn't. He was shot. The doctors said he died on the spot, not feeling any pain. Jessica sure did. Still after all these years she still couldn't believe that it had happened, her Mike gone. It had changed her view of the world, she still liked to gossip, but she didn't come up with the vicious rumours herself anymore. She tried to teach her daughter that everything was special and that she should enjoy every moment of it. Of course she never listened to her. They didn't look alike, but on the inside Jane was a copy of how her mother had been when she was a teen. Jessica sighed again tearing herself away from the painful memories. She debated whether she should open the letter or not. She couldn't stand old wounds to be ripped open again, but she couldn't stand not knowing either. She put the letter down on the table and went to put the kettle on. Ten minutes later she sat herself down at the table with a cup of steaming tea in her hands; she could do this. Hell, she needed to do this. So she tore opened the envelope and unfolded the letter quickly.

_Dear Jessica, _

_You must wonder why I would write to you after all this time. The truth is you were one of my first real friends I've ever had, and I can't begin to express the regret I feel for throwing everyone, especially you, out of my life. At the time it seemed like the right thing to do, leave with Edward and his family to Alaska to start my education there. I wanted to build a new life and thought it best to burn the ships I left behind._

_However, at a certain age you've come to realise the mistakes you made. I learned the hard way when Edward left me for Alice. I know what you must think aren't they brother and sister? No they aren't, unfortunately for me. I should've listened to you that day you said Edward and the rest of the Cullens were no good. But let me first explain the complicated family tree of the Cullens. Both Edward and Alice lost their parents and were adopted by Carlisle and Esme Cullen. Edward and Alice happened to be born on the same day and thought it would be cool to act like twins, and so their inside joke became popular believe in Forks back in the day._

_I often wished Edward would've left me sooner, so Jasper and I wouldn't have gone trough all this pain, however, if he had done that I wouldn't have had my beautiful daughter Renesmee, and my precious grand daughter Bella. _

_I hope you can forgive me for throwing you out of my life, I'm sorry. _

_Furthermore I hope you're very happy. May life bring you its best?_

_Your friend,_

_Bella Swan_

Jessica re-read the letter again and again tracing every letter. She couldn't believe it – the golden couple was no more. She understood how horrible Bella must've felt; not only did Edward cheat on her, he cheated on her with her best friend. It was hard for Jessica to wrap her mind around it. She slowly sipper her tea, when the thuds on the staircase indicated that Jane was up and about. "Morning, honey" she said as her daughter entered the room. "Morning mum, what's that?" she asked pointing to the letter in Jessica's hand.

Jessica smiled a sad smile "It's a letter from an old friend."

Jane nodded in response and let the subject rest. "You'll never guess what happened and Bronson's party last night!" Jane exclaimed.

Jessica arched her eyebrow "please tell."

"There are these two new kids, Bella Cullen and Jasper Whitlock, you've heard of them right?" Jessica nodded her head in agreement and Jane continues "well they're like cousins and they kissed! And not an innocent peck on the lips either. A full on the mouths kiss, kiss. The one you read about in romance novels, it was like primal." Jane shuddered in disgust "Incest is so gross."

"Well it's not exactly incest" Jessica muttered to herself a bit shocked at such behaviour.

"What's that mum?"

"Well, it's just that they're not related. Well not by blood anyways." Jessica told her daughter.

"What does that mean?" Jane looked at her mum dumbfounded.

"It means that their grandparents weren't twins, they were both adopted and happened to be born on the same day. So you know Forks, everyone thought they were related."

"So they're not related, but still it's gross."

Jessica nodded her head in agreement. That it is.

(JPOV)

Monday rolled by quickly and Bella was fidgeting. "Jazz, what if Jessica didn't spread the story, what if everyone still thinks we're blood relatives?" she cried out. I had to suppress a smile, throughout the weekend Bella had reassured me that gossipers don't change their ways and that she was certain that by Monday the whole school would still deem it improper, but at least they wouldn't think we were related. "Bella, it is going to be okay.' I quietly reassured her. "In the worst case scenario they still think we're cousins, well it wouldn't be the first time cousins got married."

"We do not live in the 1800s anymore Jazz! People don't marry their cousins anymore!"

I sighed and ran my hand through my hair. "Bells come on. If we can't deal we just pack up and leave. Nothing ties us here." Bella took a deep breath and smiled at me. "Thanks Jazz, you're the best." She gave me a peck on the cheek; I touched the spot and decided not to take any showers anytime soon. "Last one to the car is a loser" She called out and raced downstairs. I followed closely "You're going down Swan!"


End file.
